Surviving Friendship After Baby


So we all have heard the infamous saying “Have kids and you will find out who your real friends are” well it's true!


When I had my first son, unfortunately, my friends were the furthest thing down my priority list. I instantly became consumed in my son's schedule, tending to my home, and husband and just trying to find some time to care for myself that I allowed myself to become a bit distant. Having a new baby was nothing I thought it would be. Honestly, it was tough breastfeeding sucked, I was sleep deprived, and depressed. Like many new moms, I began wanting my “normal” life back where I had plenty of time to grab drinks with the girls or even a simple phone call about the latest and greatest.

I was one who felt that having a baby wouldn't change anything. I just knew that I would still be the same woman I always was, and my friendships for sure would not change. Well, I'm here to tell you EVERYTHING CHANGED! 

By the time my son was three years old, I didn't have many friends anymore. Life changed for all of us, and unfortunately, our friendships drifted away. One night after putting my son to sleep, I was sitting on my couch, drinking my second glass of wine, I picked up my phone to scroll through Facebook.  I saw a status from an "old" friend who had just had a baby and seemed to be going through some baby blues of her own, and I decided to reach out. That simple " Hey if you need to talk your more then welcome to call or text me" turned into the start of rekindling the friendship I desperately needed. 

We all need that good girlfriend! Someone who you can call for everything major and minor that goes on in your life. Someone to uplift you when you're not feeling to sure of your self. Someone who can answer "Am I tripping?" text at 1 am. You know the friend that can actually say "YES your tripping do better."

I refound my friend that day! Till this day I never thanked her for what she did for me. If she even thinks she did anything at all. 

Yanna, thank you for being my good girlfriend! Thank you for being there during a time I felt as though I was losing myself to motherhood. Thank you for reassuring me that friendship is totally possible after having a baby!

See friendship like any relationship requires communication, love, and making your friend feel as though they are a priority in your life. Have a friend you haven't checked on in a while? Miss an old friend? Reach Out; you never know your good girlfriend may just be waiting to hear from you. 

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Shanophia3 Comments